Connect Canyons
Episode 70: Putting Wellness First How One Room is Helping Students Manage Emotions
Fred Rogers once said, “I'm convinced that when we help our children find healthy ways of dealing with their feelings, ways that don't hurt them or anyone else, we're helping to make our world a safer, better place.”
In today's world, we're faced with all sorts of challenges and stressful situations, from the simple everyday tasks of getting to school on time and making sure projects are finished to the heavier unexpected obstacles. Sometimes all we need to do is to take a moment to recenter ourselves, and as we learn in the latest episode of Connect Canyons, schools are providing room for just that.
Wellness rooms have become important tools in our schools.
Fred Rogers once said, “I'm convinced that when we help our children find healthy ways of dealing with their feelings, ways that don't hurt them or anyone else, we're helping to make our world a safer, better place.”
In today's world, we're faced with all sorts of challenges and stressful situations, from the simple everyday tasks of getting to school on time and making sure projects are finished to the heavier unexpected obstacles. Sometimes all we need to do is to take a moment to recenter ourselves, and as we learn in the latest episode of Connect Canyons, schools are providing room for just that.
Wellness rooms have become important tools in our schools.
Fred Rogers once said I'm convinced that when we help our children find healthy ways of dealing with their feelings, ways that don't hurt them or anyone else, we're helping to make our world a safer, better place. In today's world, we're faced with all sorts of challenges and stressful situations, from the simple everyday tasks of getting to school on time and making sure projects are finished to the heavier unexpected obstacles. Sometimes all we need to do is to take a moment to recenter ourselves. Many of our schools are providing rooms that are just for that. Wellness rooms have become important tools in our school, and today joining us is Erin Moreno from Out of View. She's an MTSS specialist, and Jessica Davies, current PTA president and former secretary at Out of View and a parent of an Out of View student. Thank you, ladies, for joining us. Happy to be here Now, erin, let's start with you. Can you tell me how the wellness room came to be.
Speaker 3:When I first started, I was a reading instructor for years, 14 years ago, and a few years ago they had us watch a training video and in it they were talking about how high schoolers have a place to go when they're needing to regulate their emotions and how it's getting more and more popular. And my achievement coach at the time her name was Noelle Jones. She saw that idea and decided to run with it at the school and asked if I wanted to run it with her, and that's how it started just from watching a training video and then her ideas.
Speaker 1:So what does the wellness room at Out of View look like? Can you kind of explain?
Speaker 3:Yeah, it is a room on the upper floor by the fourth grade classrooms and it's a darker room, a darker setting, with mood lighting and mood music, and it's got tools in there. It's got fidget toys, puzzles, books, coloring books, games, chairs, carpets. I've got a little teepee in there with cushions and the mood lighting is crucial because it really the second you walk in. It really calms you down and it kind of makes you feel like you've been transported into a just a deeper place, better place.
Speaker 1:Now I would think that a lot of times that people would maybe assume that a room like that is going to be abused as a place for a kid just to escape a classroom when they don't want to. It's math. I don't want to be in math. Yes, I'm going to go hang out and play with fidget toys. How do you avoid something like that with the wellness room?
Speaker 3:You know, even a kid that is escaping a classroom and coming and abusing air quotes, abusing the room. They have a need that's not being met. And I do have kids that come in every single day and, in particular, there was a child that came in last year at the same exact time every single day and it took me a minute to. I knew he was coming in at the same time, but it took me a minute to figure out why exactly he was coming in and it was because they were transferring into math class at that time. And it made me realize that and I talked to him about this the fact that he he wasn't sad like he was saying, he wasn't missing mom, like he was telling me it was. He doesn't like math. And so once we figured that out, we made a plan so that the transition into math was a little easier.
Speaker 3:So, yes, we do have kids that, you know quote abuse the room, but there's a reason for that. There's a reason why they need to come up. It could be just they want to come up and see me. I have a lot of kids that come up just to just to see me, just to get a high five, just to get a. You're doing great, you're amazing and I'm okay with that.
Speaker 1:Well, every kid needs more adults in their life to give them that extra boost of you're. Okay, Jessica, working in the front desk, what did you notice with students that did need the escape, that were in situations where the anxiety was to the point that they needed to go to the wellness room when you helped I assume that you had times that you helped send students there. What have you noticed? What have you observed about the wellness room?
Speaker 2:Well, it was interesting because sometimes you would get students that would be coming down to the office frequently because they had stomach aches or they weren't feeling well, but they really weren't sick. And so once you kind of discovered that pattern, it was easy to recognize that maybe this was more of an emotional thing than an actual physical thing. And then once that happened, we would send them up to them to the wellness room and they would meet with Erin and usually that would kind of help, you know, when they felt like they had that adult that they could go to in the school to help them if they're feeling a little anxious or they're feeling a little bit out of sorts. It was just a great place to be able to send them.
Speaker 1:Post COVID anxiety seems to be at an all-time high. Have you noticed an uptick?
Speaker 3:Oh, yes, very much so. You know, it used to be years ago that I barely learned the word anxiety. Now we have six-year-olds coming in telling me they have anxiety and when I ask them what it means, if they know what that means, they know what that means. And it's quite amazing that a child can have all the symptoms and all the signs and all the nervous ticks and all of the blinks and the shaking in first grade.
Speaker 3:And I think it's because we live in a kind of a scary world for these kids and they're leaving mom and dad and they're coming here after being home for COVID, for instance, and it's nerve-wracking for anyone, let alone a six-year-old or a seven-year-old, and there's a lot of pressure being put on them to perform. There's a lot of rules to follow I mean, there's always been rules to follow but for some reason nowadays kids are feeling more pressure than ever to perform perfectly, to perform great and to perform above level and it's really hard on these kids. A lot of kids get it right, you know, they just can go out there and dive right in, but there are a lot of kids that they really struggle. They really struggle and they need someone there on their side.
Speaker 1:So when a kid comes to your room, what is the procedure, what is the process?
Speaker 3:So they come in and every single kid has a human interaction with me or whoever's in there, but it's usually 99% of the time it's me and every kid has that interaction. And I get up and I say you know, hey, buddy, what's going on, what's wrong? And I have on my desk there are four different colors. I have green, yellow, red and blue, and each one of those represents a different feeling, a different emotion. We want to get them to green because that's hey, yeah, I'm ready to go back to class. They may not be, you know, smiling and jumping and talking about rainbows and butterflies, but they're ready to go back to class. So they come in and I ask them what's going on, and sometimes they want to talk about it, sometimes they don't, which is fine, but we do talk about how they're feeling, because I need them to recognize how they're feeling. Sometimes they'll tell me one feeling and the more we talk about it, they realize that they're not sad, they're really nervous about something or they're not angry, they're just really lonely. And so we narrow down on what that is. It doesn't take very long, maybe 10 seconds, I mean, it's not a hard process and then I ask them to go pick a tool. Well, first of all, I ask them if they want to talk about it and, like I said, some do, some don't. Then I ask them if they want to use a tool. We call them tools and not toys for obvious reasons. The tool is to help them in whatever way that they need help. So they pick one tool, they get one tool, that's it, and that's basically to help them focus and to help narrow down their mind. That's going crazy at the time.
Speaker 3:So they pick the one tool, they sit and we turn over a timer and then after about 10 minutes, I say so how are you feeling? Are you feeling a little bit better? Are you feeling ready to get back to class? 98% of the time they're like yeah, I'm ready to go. And then they get up and I always give them I started this, well, the first day I give them a little bit of magic and it sounds really silly, but these kids eat it up, they love it. Not one kid leaves there without the quote magic and I just say you're doing great, you're doing amazing. I'm actually wearing this sweatshirt right now that says hey, go out there and be amazing. And they love it and they go out with a smile on their face and I give them a high five and say go, take on the world. And they do great. It takes about 10 minutes.
Speaker 1:That's pretty amazing. Now, jessica, you have a student at Alteview and I know that there's been times that she's had to use the room. Can you tell me a little bit, as a mother, what it means to be able to have this in your school?
Speaker 2:It's funny that Erin mentioned that it's magic, because when I asked my daughter coming in here to tell me a little bit about the wellness room and how she perceives it, and the word she used was magic, she said oh yeah, it's magic, it's magical.
Speaker 2:As a parent, even if my child wasn't using the wellness room and she's told me she uses it probably nine to ten times a year, so one to two times a month but even if she wasn't using it, it's very reassuring to me as a parent that it's there, because it tells me not only that the school you know cares about my child's reading and math scores, but they care about my child holistically, and so even for parents whose kids might not be using the wellness room, it just sends a message that the school cares about them as individuals.
Speaker 2:And life is messy and growing up is messy and as an adult I sometimes have a hard time dealing with my emotions and knowing how to handle them and you hear stories on the news about, you know, road rage incidents and I think there are a lot of adults that haven't learned how to manage their emotions. And then we send our kids out into the world and we expect them to be perfect and to manage their emotions and I love that at our school and these schools that have the wellness room, they acknowledge that growing up is messy, emotions are messy and our kids aren't going to be perfect and it creates that space for them and it's just very reassuring as a parent to know that all those adults in that school have kind of created a culture of recognizing the holistic child and not just their math and test scores.
Speaker 1:When you send students back into the classroom. What are you hearing from the teachers as far as how this has affected their grades and their performance in the classroom?
Speaker 3:The second, they go back into the classroom. Most of the time they're able to sit at their desk and they're able to do the work and they're able to focus. Now there, of course, are those kids that are the anomaly, that are going to have a harder time and maybe need to do it a couple more times or maybe need to have other things to help. But most of the kids come in and they're refreshed and wide awake and ready to go, have a smile on their face and ready to take on the day. But there are some kids that you know they need a little bit more time and we have calming corners in every classroom where most of the time they do it before they come into my room, but a lot of times they can do it afterwards as well, if the room just wasn't enough. Now, going back to the room, if I feel like the kid just isn't ready to go back, I'll give him a couple extra minutes and we'll change tools, change tactics, and or I'll take him on a walk right after before sending him back into the classroom.
Speaker 3:I had a little boy come in this morning who was just in tears. It's hard coming back from a four day week when you're in first grade and he was just in tears and I miss my mom. I miss my mom, and so, after we talked a while in the classroom, I took him on a little walk and we talked about the process of coming back and what he did over the weekend and tell me five good things about your mom, tell me five good things about your dad. You know, we just talked it through and it's amazing, the power of talking, just talking to a child. You learn so much about the child and about yourself, to be perfectly honest, and so I consider myself a professional listener, because that's really all you need to do is listen to the child and they will tell you what to do and tell you how they're feeling, and by telling you how they're feeling, it tells you what you can do to help them get back into the classroom and ready to learn what tips would you give parents?
Speaker 1:as far as, if you are seeing anxiety in your child and you're seeing moments where maybe they don't want to go to school because they're feeling a little anxious, what kind of tips would you give to a parent to talk those things out?
Speaker 3:You know it's a fine line between pushing them and holding them back. There truly is a fine line, because there are a lot of kids that you have to push them through it and say, no, you. It's like leaving them with a babysitter when they're crying. If you just leave the room, they're going to be fine after a few minutes. But there are other kids that you can't do that to because then it'll create more anxiety. So you only you know that your child.
Speaker 3:I have five kids myself, four boys, one girl, and my boys were all very you know. No, let's go, let's dive in, let's go. We got this, but there was one in particular that really had a hard time separating himself from me, and it's those kids that you have to listen to. You need to listen and slow your own life down so that you can listen to your child and really listen.
Speaker 3:Like I was saying about the child who was, you know, had a hard time going into math, your child may not be scared of school. They may be scared of a work assignment's coming up, or they may be scared of a bully, or they may be scared of their actual teacher. There's moments when everybody is scared and if you just listen to your child, you can figure out the one thing that's making this all click and you can resolve that issue much easier if you take the time to just listen and to hold your child and figure out what's going on that way and break it down into the pieces. Break it down from a big big picture into the small little pieces and work from there. It's a lot easier to deal with the anxiety in the child.
Speaker 1:Jessica, what differences did you see once your child started going to the wellness room?
Speaker 2:I think one of the biggest things is when, after school, if I'd ask her how her day was or ask her to tell me about her day, going to the wellness room was almost a jumping off point for her to where she could talk about things with me.
Speaker 2:So she may be having strong emotions, and if I ask her how her day was and what she did during the day, usually one of the first things she'll say is I went to the wellness room today and that's her way of opening up to me to let me know that she wants to talk to me about something, maybe about something that happened at school with her friends or just some emotions that she's been having.
Speaker 2:And so it's just interesting to me that going and seeing Miss Erin and spending that time to self-reflect in the wellness room gave her the opportunity to feel like she could come to me as a parent and kind of share what she was feeling with me, so that we could kind of talk those things through.
Speaker 2:So that's probably the biggest thing that I've noticed is it's helped her to open up a little bit more and a little bit easier with me. The other thing that I've noticed about it is I think my daughter has a personality that sometimes she'd just need someone on one time and her teachers are absolutely fantastic and they provide that when they can. Sometimes, I think, she wants it at a time when maybe it's not realistic for the teachers. They could be up talking in class, they could be working with other students, and so the wellness room provides a safe space for her to get that one-on-one time. She can go see Miss Erin and just have a real connection with an adult at the school when she feels like she's needing it, and then that helps her to be stronger during the day. That's perfect.
Speaker 3:So I wanna make it clear that I don't do any therapy in the room. I'm not a therapist, I don't do therapy, I just listen and it's a place for the kids to go to have someone who is looking them in the eye and listening, and teachers don't always. Like Jessica said, teachers don't always have that time to listen to a child one-on-one, and there are a lot of kids that truly need you to listen to them. I have two kids in particular that come in every single day, twice a day on a scheduled time, and that's not a thing we don't really do scheduled times but for these kids this is what they needed and they come in and I draw with them, we color and they absolutely love it and it helps them to regulate their moods and emotions and get through it.
Speaker 3:It's been open for two and a half years. Our principal has been amazing in allowing us to have. He was a little skeptical at first, I'm not gonna lie but he's seen the benefits of it. He's seen the data that we're taking and he's seen the amount of kids that have come in. Today I had my 2,387th kid come in to see me and that's 2,000 kids that needed something that our school was able to provide, and it's been an amazing journey to see the smiles on the kids' faces after they've been in there for a while, and it's truly a magical room that we have over there.
Speaker 1:That's awesome, and it's also another point of contact that if they do need, like you said, since you're not offering therapy, that's one more point of contact that if they do need something more, you can find it for them, whether it be therapy or if they're missing Many times, if they need help with homework or if they need further aid with we have students that might need food assistance or those sort of things. This is one more point of contact that we can find out information about our students that sometimes is hard to find out.
Speaker 3:We can catch those things. So it's the little things that you catch on a day-to-day basis, when you just slow down a minute and I have the ability to slow down- that's perfect.
Speaker 1:Thank you, guys so much for coming in today and thank you for listening to Connect Canyons. If you have any story ideas, please drop us a line at communications, at canyonsdistrictorg.